Have you ever screamed at the top of your lungs from the depths of your gut and soul because you really understood that you were free? Well… maybe you haven’t or maybe you think this sounds crazy. But tonight I did. Something amazing came to life in the cracks of my soul and heart that only the Lord Jesus Christ could do.
I was driving in the thickest fog ever and as every thing looked black, the Spirit said,
“Chelsie, I am Your light… everything else should fade and you should not be scared in the dark. You don’t need to run around in the dark trying to find the way out, just look at me.”
And all of a sudden, all I could see was Him. He has been taking me through a journey of breaking me and pouring out all of who I am, so He could make my heart and very being His home… so that He may be glorified and that others may know who He is.
Nothing changed in that moment tonight— well what I mean is that I was still broken. But something beautiful happens when you realize that you need to be broken. We must be broken so we die to ourselves and live in all Christ commands. We cannot love; only Christ is love. If His power, strength and all He is does not pour out of us, then everything is a waste. When we are full of ourselves, there’s nothing that can happen… well nothing that really matters.
But I suppose everything did change in that moment.
I felt like the blind man that Jesus healed and when He was questioned by everyone all he could say was,
“All I know is that I was blind but now I see.”
I was free.
So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.
John 8:36
I think our fear and flesh really gets in the way so much of really believing and living this. You see, when Christ sets us free, it’s all paid for. On the cross, He said,
“It is finished.”
Oh Lord, forgive us for all the times we live like it’s not.
But our freedom is not to just give you and I hope or a happy little life on this earth… no. It is far greater than that. It’s to be poured out for His glory so the world can see His freedom and all who He is. It’s so others can walk, dance, scream, rejoice and live in freedom.
Tonight, I was talking to God about what it meant to really pray.
“Your Kingdom come, Your will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.”
Those aren’t just some nice words to a prayer that a ton of people know… do you realize the weight of that? That’s asking God for Earth to be like Heaven… freedom. For God to live and do great amazing things amongst His people so those are dying can find life.
In the dark, He was all I could see.
In Him, I saw hope, grace, love, mercy, joy, vision, purpose, strength, justice, steadfastness, patience… everything. I saw hope and freedom for a dying world.
And as I was driving in the fog and talking to God, I let it all out. I screamed with such joy from the top of my lungs. It was almost like I was shocked as I said over and over,
“All glory to You my God! I am free! I am free! All for you and your glory! I am free!”
I felt the sweetest tears of joy stream from the corners of my eyes. I started to laugh as I just told God how worthy He is and as I prayed for all of those He would set free as I asked Him to pour me out. I realized there was nothing in me at that moment… none of it was in my nature. It was something so radically beautiful.. it was God.
I don’t know if you have ever experienced freedom… of course I did almost 14 years ago when I realized all who Jesus was and that I was desperately in need of Him to save me. But I believe that as long as we are on this earth, we have to be set free… a lot. I think the saddest thing is when Christians never live like Jesus paid it all. Sometimes I think we all forget that because we are weak and we lose focus (I am so thankful He loves us enough to draw us back and never give up on us), but some people never live in this side of Eternity in freedom.
There’s power in freedom.
And when the world sees freedom, true freedom, it cannot help but take notice.
If you know what I am talking about, there’s so much to celebrate and truly thank and bless our Lord for. I’ve never screamed like that in my life… it was definitely a sweet moment with God. He’s our light and our freedom.
Time’s too short to not live free… others lives are depending on it.
I’m so thankful God blacked out everything so all I could see was Him.
With love,
Chee
